Numb
by Zero Is Plural
Summary: SongFic to Linkin Park's "Numb" Draco refuses to follow in his father's footsteps and pays the ultimate price. PG13 for violence.


Disclaimer: I don't own the HP characters, and the song is by Linkin Park, called "Numb". 

Authors Note: Okay, this is my fist shot at a song fic. Now, I usually hate this band, but I like this song. I was listening to it, and inspiration struck. I bet there will be a lot of song fics to this, but oh well. I am known for my clichés. Right then, onward.

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I can't take this anymore. I'm going to go crazy if I don't get out of here.

"You get back here this instant! Don't walk away from me when I'm talking to you! You insolent little –" 

I don't hear the rest of what my father says due to the fact that I have slammed the door in his face. I am halfway across the sprawling lawn when the doors burst open and I hear a cold voice mutter "_Crucio_."

The spell hits me and I double over, glaring silently at the man in front of me. I never scream. I won't give him that satisfaction. He raises his wand and I stand defiantly before him. He takes my arm and leans until his face is almost touching mine. His eyes glint evilly.

"You will confess your devotion to the Dark Lord. You will join his ranks."

**I'm tired of being what you want me to be  
Feeling so faithless lost under the surface  
Don't know what you're expecting of me  
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes  
Every step that I take is another mistake to you******

His voice is dangerously low and deceptively calm. He would kill me if he thought it would suit his master. He would probably kill me anyway.

"No." I breathe, trying not to cry out. He has a death grip on my arm and I can feel a bruise forming.

"What did you say to me?" He yanks my arm and pulls me closer. He looks almost angelic, outlined by the yellow light coming from the house. But I know better. This man is no angel. Far from it.

"No." I repeat, stronger this time. "I refuse to bow to him. I refuse to take orders from a monster. I refuse to be like you." I say these last few words with added malice. He lets go of my arm and steps away.

"Well now. We will see about that. _Crucio_."

This time I force myself to stand up straight. I barley feel this pain anymore. 

**I've become so numb I can't feel you there  
I've become so tired so much more aware  
I'm becoming this all I want to do  
Is be more like me and be less like you**

He lifts his wand and watches me, but I do nothing. I will not bend to him. I will not give in. he moves toward me again.

"I will disinherit you. When I'm gone, you will get none of this." He sweeps a hand around, indication the dark manor. "You will be thrown out of my home. You will no longer be my son."

I glare at him.

"Do you think I care about your money? Do you think I care if I am thrown out? I would rather be a pauper than be your son." I spit at his feet.

**Can't you see that you're smothering me  
Holding too tightly afraid to lose control  
Cause everything that you thought I would be  
Has fallen apart right in front of you  
Every step that I take is another mistake to you**

His eyes flash. I have dishonored him. Good. Maybe he will kill me now, and end this all. I'm tired. I'm tired of having to pretend to be something I'm not. Tired of bowing and scraping and pledging allegiance to a Lord that I have no faith in. I'm tired of being my father.

"I hate you." I whisper venomously. 

**I've become so numb I can't feel you there  
I've become so tired so much more aware  
I'm becoming this all I want to do  
Is be more like me and be less like you**

He grabs my arm again, but this time he doesn't say a word, just drags me back into the house and slams the door. The noise gets the attention of my mother. No, I don't want her here. I love my mother, and I don't want her to see this. 

I know she married him because she had to. Her family was close with his, and it had all been arranged. Much like my future marriage to that Parkinson slut.

My mother comes into the entrance hall and gasps. I don't want her to see this. I know how it will end, and it will crush her.

"Mother, go. Please." I give her a pleading look. She looks horrified. My father raises his hand and strikes me.

"Shut up, boy. Narcissa, don't move. The boy will pledge his loyalty to Lord Voldemort. _Now_!" He shakes me.

I blink and blood trickles into the corner of my eye. It burns.

**And I know  
I may end up failing too  
But I know  
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you**

"Never. I hate you, I hate the Dark Lord." I spit again. "Go to hell, _Father_."

He pushes me away from him and I land hard on the marble floor. His eyes flash again and he raises his wand. My mother screams and I stand. I will not die on my knees. I tip my head back and glare at him defiantly.

"I love you, Mother. I shall miss you."

 The last thing I see is my mother sobbing and a flash of green light before I plunge into oblivion. Dark and silent and complete. Ah, euphoria.

**I've become so numb I can't feel you there  
I've become so tired so much more aware  
I'm becoming this all I want to do  
Is be more like me and be less like you******


End file.
